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Hell is in Your Head

from Hell is in Your Head by Senses Fail

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lyrics

I spend so much of my precious time worrying about how Im going to die
If I could just focus that energy I would be a billionaire or a famous astrophysicist
Instead Im writing the same boring songs about suffering
The older I get the hard it gets Im crippled by my anxiety
I never thought that Id be a father.
I hope my neurosis ain’t a bother
Some days it feels like I’m failing.
My therapist says that it’s normal.
She made her diagnosis formal, I can’t connect like a normal person because of all my pain

There’s no road map that I can give to you
Just hold on tight and know that I love you

The first six months they flew by the next two years did to
Now Im looking at old photos and it feels like Im losing you
No matter what I do you’ll grow away from me but I signed up for this tragedy
I want to make sure you know you’ll always be enough
I want to make sure your hair is never tied in knots
I want to walk you down any aisle anywhere
I just want to live long enough
God Im scared
Im so unprepared
Its so unfair
God Im scared

I gotta keep it together
A husband has gotta be better
A father has gotta be weather

I gotta keep it together like a basement in the storm but Im floating in the ether like a feather when the siren starts to roar.
I will always be your shelter but the storm will someday come but you can always find me in the way you choose to love.
I gotta keep it together

You are the light that leads me home
What the hell is wrong with me?
Why do I always feel like Im dying?
God will it ever stop?
Someone please make it stop
Someone please help me Im not gonna make it

Ive been spending so much of my precious time worrying about how my friends will die instead of actually hanging out with them.
I catalog all of my physical symptoms just in case there is something Im missing.
From what I can tell I think I have a disease.
The older I get the hard it gets Im crippled by my anxiety

I waste so much of my life wondering if this world is nothing but suffering
Im crumbling like clay into dirt hoping for water but praying for worse.
If I should bloom then I’ll wither
The only time I get warmth is when I shiver

credits

from Hell is in Your Head, released July 15, 2022

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Senses Fail New Jersey

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